Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?
by oOoXTheLikelySuspectXoOo
Summary: Aria has moved on after Ezra abondonded her and never came back but now that she's getting married, will memories prove strong enough to tear apart the soon to be wed? Read on :
1. Return to Rosewod

**First off to all that think this is like Chang of Heart, it is not! Nothing like that other story of mine! My summaries are not fantastic so just read the chapter, okay? Review if you want me to write more!**

**Thank you**

"I love you." Aria smiled as she spoke. "I love you, too, beautiful. See you this weekend. Bye." Aria hit END CALL and twirled her loose curl, thinking about Austin, her amazing fiancé. Two weeks after Ezra left Rosewood without explanation, Austin had moved to Rosewood and taken a liking to Aria. He was handsome and funny and in a few months Aria had all but forgotten her long lost English Teacher. The two had gone to the same college in New York and eventually Austin popped the question. Aria accepted, duh, and herself and Austin started wedding plans. He was in a conference in Cleveland and wouldn't be back for almost four days.

Aria snuck into their bedroom and dug through it to find her well hidden wedding dress. She gazed at it and pictured the day. Austin and Aria were getting married in Hawaii in a month on the beach. The dress was white and soft, with multiple flows. It was beautiful and she looked beautiful in it. After the mood passed Aria pushed it careful back into it's hiding spot. Then there was a clatter. "What the . . .?" Aria looked down at her feet. Her Yearbook from Sophomore Year. "Oh . . ." she whispered, picking it up, resting on the edge of the bed.

The front page was dedicated to Alison, of course. Seeing her face shook Aria a bit. Then she flipped through, finding pictures of Spencer, Emily, Hanna, and herself. They all looked so young. Aria smiled and laughed as familiar memories danced across her mind. Then she saw a face she had forgotten. It made her mouth go dry and throat become sore. Ezra. Aria shut the book quickly. It shouldn't have but it made her heart break all over again. Aria felt the tears she thought she had long since been used up return and splatter onto the front of the book. She dropped the book, using her stiletto to kick it under the bed. Why did it still hurt so badly?

She wanted to clear her head, to not be here right now. She called Hanna, who lived fifteen minutes away, and asked her if she wanted to go to the movies. "Sure but this is awfully spontaneous, Aria, I need a few minutes." Aria sniffed up, "O-okay, how about if I meet you there?" Hanna paused, "Aria have you been crying? What happened." Aria laughed sadly, "I just found a picture of he who should not be named and I'm just a little down. Y'know Austin isn't here so I can't just cuddle up with him. I need a few hours . . . I don't know, just not alone." Hanna made a sympathetic sound, "Totally understandable, I'll be at the Radley in twenty minutes, okay?" Aria nodded and breathed out, "Yeah, see you there."

Aria stood inside the Radley Lobby, looking over the movies and considering which ones would be better. A romantic comedy? No then she would miss Austin more. A Drama? Well that would give her an opportunity to cry more without people knowing she _wasn't _crying over the movie. A mystery? Perfect. She walked over to the ticket booth, "Hi, can I get two for _The Clock Without Hands_?" An emotionless, acne riddled teenager passively exchanged the tickets for her money. "Well . . ." she mumbled under her breath.

As she stood outside the Radley, waiting for Hanna, it got colder. And she could have sworn she heard someone call her name. It sounded familiar but she couldn't figure out where from. She looked around. No one. Huh. "Aria!" there it was again! It was closer. Then there was a tap on her shoulder. "Han . . .?" she spun around. She couldn't finish the name. All she could see were sapphire blue eyes, thick brown curls, and lips which had grazed hers on more than one occasion. Aria barely found enough of her voice to murmur, "Ezra?"

**Now that was short but it was like an introduction! I won't write more if you don't like so PLEASE review if you want more. Don't keep it to yourself or else it wont' happen. Love you gusy, and if you got this far thank you for reading **


	2. Why?

**I am so thankful for the reviews, everyone! U r all so amazing! **

"Aria." He whispered, sending those same delicious shivers down her spine. Aria just looked at him, she had no words. But she did have actions. She didn't understand why she did it, she had never been the violent type, but she struck him across the cheek with all of the power in her small, 123 pound body. He had stumbled back a little and a few people slowed to see what would continue after this. He just rubbed his skin while looking down, "I guess I deserved that." He mumbled.

"Why are you here?" she asked frostily between her teeth. Ezra shrugged, not taking his eyes of her. "I moved back to town. I guess some part of me thought when we ran into each other you might be happy to see me."Aria laughed humorlessly.

"I've missed you he . . ." he said. He was about to say more but Aria cut him off, screaming, "You are not allowed to say that! DO you even comprehend what hell you put me through? Ezra I loved you with all of my heart but you just abandoned me! Just . . . just leave me alone!" she shoved past him, trying not to like the way he felt against her, and went into the movie theatre lobby again. She texted Hanna to meet her in the theatre and which number they'd be in.

Unbelievable. He was back. Even though she hated what he had done a very small part of her was relieved he was alright. For weeks Aria had been convinced Ezra hadn't left on his own free will. At least now she knew he had been completely free to leave, but that made it hurt worse.

That had meant he wanted to leave her, he didn't want her anymore. And that made her question ever time he said I love you and every moment of their lives together. By the time Hanna found her, Aria had begun crying all over again.

Hanna looked her over, "I saw him outside . . ." guessing what her friend was crying about. Aria just nodded. "He said he misses you and wants to talk." Aria sighed, "And what did you say?" Hanna smirked, "I told him to shove something very hard and sand-papery up where the sun doesn't shine." Aria chuckled lightly.

"How is it possible to love someone so much and also want to rip out their heart at the same time?" Aria sulked. "You still love him?" Hanna quirked. Aria stopped. Had she really said that? She shrugged, "I love Austin." Hanna rubbed Aria's shoulder, "It's possible to love more than one person, Aria." She soothed. Aria breathed out shakily as the lights dimmed and the movie started. She tried hard to concentrate on the depthless characters but all she thought about was Ezra.

As they stepped out of the theatre, Hanna rambled on about how hot the detective had been in the movie. Aria just nodded."Want to go to Starbucks or something?" Hanna smiled. Aria nodded, "Thanks for dealing with me tonight . . ." Hanna scoffed, "What are BS for?" BS was Hanna's way of saying Blood Sisters. Aria smirked, "I still can't believe we did that, and you really need to stop using that acronym."

Across the street, they stepped into the glass walled Starbucks. While Hanna ordered her coffee and a super large chocoholic cookie, Aria was mixing in a mountain of sugar into her cappuccino. When they sat down Aria pulled apart her cinnamon bun, eating it while she read an email from Mike telling her he might have to miss the rehearsal dinner because his boss needed him to work until the day before the wedding.

Half an hour later Hanna smiled and said, "I have to get home if I'll catch any sleep before work." Aria smirked, "Oh, Yeah! How does it feel to be the youngest VP in Louis Vuitton history?" Hanna shrugged then sighed emotionlessly, "Amazing." Aria giggled and stood up to hug her friend. "Love you." She smiled. "Love you, too, Babe. Call me tomorrow night." Hanna smiled as she left the Starbucks.

Aria finished her cinnamon bun as the door opened again. Aria looked up, expecting Hanna to remind her about something but it was Ezra. He caught her eyes immediately and advanced towards her quickly, "Just let me explain." He sighed calmly. Aria stood up throwing away her coffee cup, "Explain what? How I was obviously just a game to you? How you ever really cared about me at all?"

Ezra mumbled something incoherent then said, "Please stop assuming things, I just want to explain some things. Please Aria?" he looked at her with a mix of regret, longing, and lust. Aria looked around helplessly. "You have as long as it takes me to drink the Cappuccino you're about to buy me . . ." she stated and Ezra smiled gratefully. Aria really wanted more than anything to hold him again, but she couldn't for a lot of reasons. One of those reasons was calling her right now as Ezra paid for their coffee.

"Austin?" she whispered into the phone on the other side of the coffee shop.

"Hey . . . what's with the secret agent voice?"

Aria laughed, returning to her normal voice, "Nothing, forget about it."

Austin groaned playfully, "Oh, don't stop . . . it's _sexy_."

Aria broke into giggles, "You're the biggest dork in the world, you know that right?"

Aria pictured Austin shrugging as he said the next thing, "All part of the appeal. I just wanted to call and tell you that the Conference was moved up to tomorrow so I'll be home by Friday."

Aria sighed, "That's great news, I can't wait! So I'll see you Friday?"

Austin smiled into his answer, "Yeah, Friday. I love you."

Aria bit her lip, "I love you, too. Bye."

Ezra came up behind her, "Who was that?" Aria comfortably shrugged and said, "Austin, my . . ." she paused and Ezra's eyes widened expectantly. She didn't know why she did it, she really didn't, but as they found a table she just smiled and said, "Cousin . . ."

**I just want to say thank you so much for all of the beautiful comments and I hope you liked this chapter! Please review !**


	3. So many reasons, but not enough

**Thank you so much for the beautiful comments they were both delightful and inspiring! Love you all, please read on.**

"So . . ." Ezra began. "So . . ." Aria repeated. "Don't be like that, Aria." Ezra sighed. "I don't know what you're talking about, Ezra." Aria bit her fingernails as she focused on the chrome table. Ezra looked at his coffee, "You have to understand I only left because I thought it would be safe." Aria scoffed, "Ezra we always found ways to avoid being caught . . ." Ezra cut her off, "But this was different, Aria. Do you remember that day that Jackie walked in on us?" Aria thought about it then nodded. Ezra sipped his coffee, "Well, after you left she came back, told me how she'd seen us around campus the last week or so and told me if I didn't end it with you she would tell your dad."

Aria shrugged, "Well weren't we working on that anyway?" Ezra nodded, "Yeah, but when I told her that, she threatened to hurt you." Aria laughed, "Jackie threatened to hurt me?" Ezra grabbed Aria's hand, "Aria, you have to understand Jackie has issues. Like deep rooted ones. She's hurt people I care about before and not like emotionally. And if she hurt me that would be one thing but if she hurt you . . ." Ezra choked up a little. Aria pulled back her hand. "Why didn't you just tell me that?"

Ezra smiled, "Because I know you. You would have stubbornly given me every reason to keep us together and I probably would have gone along with it like usual. Then when Jackie saw us she would have hurt you and I honestly think I would have killed her. So, I left that night. Figured it would be easier if you hated me . . ."

"I've never hated you." Aria mumbled. Ezra looked at her meaningfully, "Really?" Aria nodded, "Never. Believe me I tried but . . . I just loved you too much to be able to hate you. But for a while I was totally messed up and miserable. I think you deserve to know that." Ezra shook his head, "I'm so sorry, Aria. I know it probably doesn't mean anything now but I still love you. Very, very much." Aria nodded, even though her heart lept at that. "I'll always love you, Ezra. You were my first in a lot of ways. My first love, my first heart break, my first . . . well, you know." Ezra nodded. It had been no secret that Ezra was her first time between them.

"I've got to get home." She said abruptly. Ezra looked around, "Oh-okay. I'll take you." Aria smirked, "Think that's the best idea?" Ezra shrugged, "What's it gonna hurt?"Aria shrugged, "Fine." Ezra and Aria walked to his Mazda across the street. When she stepped in she was immediately thrown by the way it smelt. The way this care smelt, the aroma it possessed, could sum up her high school years in one snap. It smelled of Ezra, Aria's favorite candle and though she couldn't explain how, it had a sad melancholy scent to it as well.

Aria guided Ezra through the streets to the apartment complex and when they finally got there, she said, "Well this is me." Ezra had a small, forced smile on his face. "Do you . . . wanna come up for a drink or something? Maybe catch up a little more?" Ezra smiled, "I'd actually really like that." They went up the elevator in silence and the apartment didn't seem close enough. Aria started mixing a few drinks while Ezra looked around. "This is a really nice place." Aria smiled, coming over to the sofa with the drinks. "Yeah, I like it."

"I have to admit, I always thought you would be engaged by now. I mean a selfish part of me hoped that you'd pine over me forever." Ezra laughed. Aria smiled, "Yeah, just haven't found the right guy I guess. I've had a few flings, nothing major." Aria didn't know why she couldn't bring herself to tell Ezra she was getting married. Maybe deep down, she wanted him to fight for her. And she knew he was too good to fight for a taken woman.

"What about you? I half expected you to have a kid by now." Aria smiled, sipping her drink. Ezra sighed, "I've never met another person who I cared enough about to even want to start a family with." Another person? Did that mean he had wanted a family with Aria? She smiled, "Do you remember that time that I signed up to baby sit Professor Knock's kids and I totally freaked out so you had to come help me get them to sleep?" Ezra laughed, "How could I forget. When I showed up, Amanda had given you a 'make-over'" he smiled, remembering the purple eye shadow on Aria's cheeks and the Barbie pink lip stick on her eyes. "I still can't believe I let you see me like that." Ezra smiled, "I would of thought you were beautiful if she had shaved your head, Aria."

Aria giggled, "Thanks for trying." Ezra scratched his neck, "I'm sorry I was such a coward. But just the thought of Jackie hurting you . . . it was too much." Aria shrugged, "I'd be lying if I said that made me feel better, but it doesn't make me feel as bad." Ezra smiled sadly, "I missed you, Aria." Aria grinned, "I missed you, too. I missed that apartment more, though." She laughed. Ezra bit his lip lightly, "I should probably get going. It's almost two A.M." Aria nodded, "I understand. It was really . . . painful . . . to see you." She smiled sympathetically.

Ezra laughed lightly, fully understanding what she meant. "Aria put her drink on the table and stood up with him, walking towards the door. He leaned down to hug her and it was light at first, but then became very strong, both remembering how good the other felt. When Ezra pulled back he and Aria looked deeply at each other. _Don't_, she thought. But as his lips got ever so close to hers, she crushed hers back to his. She wanted to feel guilty, but all she felt was Ezra. And he felt so good.

**I know that chapter was a weensy bit of a cliché but I want them together so badly! And yes, this chapter was a HUGE drama bomb! Thank you, PLEASE review!**


	4. No

**Thank you, thank you, thank you! Love you guys so much!**

Aria squeezed her eyes impossibly close together before opening her eyes. At first she felt peaceful. A peace that hadn't washed over her in a long time. Then she remembered what happened. She looked over next to herself to see Ezra sleeping. Naked.

Aria put her hand over her mouth and started breathing in and out heavily. "No." she whispered to herself. Why hadn't she stopped it? The truth was that a part of her wanted to keep going. But they'd gone to far. Aria wrapped the sheet around herself and pushed Ezra's shoulder roughly.

"What's up, hostile?" He said, rubbing his eyes.

"Get out, please." She said below a whisper.

He looked confused. "Aria . . ." he said confused, and hurt.

"Just get out!" She said louder, clutching the sheet closer to herself. Ezra reached for her but she ripped away, jumping from the bed. "I'm going into the restroom, when I get back I want you gone. Please, Ezra, if you care about me at all you'll leave." She said painfully. When she shut the door behind herself, she collapsed to the floor.

How could she have done this to Austin? To the love of her life. Aria laid her head against the door til she heard the front door slam. Aria's breath shook. She'd also done this to Ezra. Her old love. And he didn't know about Austin. She'd lied about him. Austin could never know about this. God how could she have done this?

_BEEEEEP! BEEEEEEP! !_

"Ah!" Aria jolted up from the couch. The alarm clock from her cell phone continued to blare. She reached over and hit CANCEL. "Wha . . .?" she looked around. A pink quilt by Gram-Gram Montgomery had been placed over her and a note held under a glass of scotch

_Aria, I missed the way I felt when I was with you and I'm sorry for kissing you when you were in no state of mind to comply. I forgot what a light weight you were, haha. If you want to talk, my number is 456-8312._

_Love, Ezra_

"Oh thank god!" Aria fell back against her sofa. A kiss was bad, but nowhere near as bad as sex. Suddenly her phone starting ringing. Hanna.

"What's up, hot cakes?" Hanna smiled into the phone call.

Aria rubbed her head, a hangover waiting to arrive soon. "Good, aren't you at work?"

"Um, Aria it's like five P.M." Hanna said, a worried under tone in her voice.

Aria stood up, "No it's not it's . . ." she checked her microwave clock, "Almost five p.m." she sighed in a monotone.

"I'm feeling fun, dinner at Sardi's?" Hanna smiled.

Aria breathed out. "Sure, see you there in an hour."

Aria clicked off the phone. Aria may not have lived the nightmare, but she felt just as disgusting. She walked over to her mirror. She looked awful. "Just eat dinner with Hanna." She sighed to herself. "And don't mention a word of anything to anyone.

**I know this was a short filler chapter, but the next will be longer! I just HAD to update. Thank you oh, yeah, and review!**


	5. Fancy Meeting you here

**Sorry this update took so incredibly long! My new doggie is having trouble being potty trained, and well . . . don't that explain it all! Lol. But the update is here!**

"Marin for two?" Aria practically yawned to the matradee. She had a name tag that read Donna. The matradee looked at her funnily while Aria rubbed her eyes, probably screwing up her eye makeup, but she was still groggy. However, she had hit the hangover earlier with some coffee and aspirin.

"Uh, right this way . . ." Donna eyed Aria as they walked to her table. Hanna smiled at Aria and waved sporadically. Donna eased up as she realized Aria really was Hanna's plus one.

"You look tired." Hanna said worriedly as Donna left. Aria looked down. "I ran into someone last night." Hanna cocked her head to the side confused then her eyes widened in revelation.

"No." she said, knowing Aria meant Ezra. Aria nodded. "What did you guys do?  
>"Nothing!" Aria whisper\shrieked. But Hanna gave her a dubious look. Aria looked down. "We kissed. Then he left. That's all!"<p>

Hanna groaned loudly, "Aria!"

Aria squeezed her eyes shut and looked around. "I don't know what happened. Oh, shit!" Aria put her hands over her eyes and moaned loudly.

"What?" Hanna leaned forward.

"I have to pick up Austin in a few hours. Han, he knows me. He'll know something's up!"

"Aria! Calm down. Okay I mean it isn't like you totally cheated on him. A kiss is a kiss. If you kissed me it wouldn't mean anything." Hanna sighed. Aria laughed lightly, feeling slightly better from Hanna's joke. A tall waiter walked up to take their orders.

_After Dinner_

"That was super good." Hanna smiled as they walked into the street. Aria nodded, "I do feel better." Hanna hailed a cab, "Look, if you need anything you know my number and where I'm at. I'm always here."

Aria nodded to her friend as Hanna got into the car. "Bye." She waved as the car slowly pulled away. Aria could see a small bookstore around the corner so she headed for it. The door dinged as she looked around and searched the isles by author. "Grisgey, Grisgle . . . Gresham." Aria mumbled to herself. Aria reviewed the limited supply. She wanted something to read at the airport while she waited for Austin's flight. Suddenly she heard someone call her name.

"Aria!" The familiar voice tolled.

"You've got to be kidding me." Aria whispered to herself before turning around to meet Ezra's eyes.

"We gotta stop meeting like this!" he joked. Aria nodded with a tight smile. She looked down at the book in her hands and headed towards the clerk.

Ezra followed her, "Are you okay?" Aria nodded, "I'm fine! I just have to get this because I need to get to the airport. To pick up my . . . um . . ."

"Cousin." Ezra finished for her. Aria nodded and felt the lump in her throat swell up. "Do you need a ride?" Ezra asked. Aria handed the book store clerk a twenty and took the book, walking towards the streets. "No I'll be okay."

Ezra laughed, "Aria, please. It would make my day just to drive with you there." Aria turned and paused. She did need a ride. And the bus wasn't her favorite form of transportation. "Okay. That would be really nice." Ezra smiled as he led her to the car. "Which airport?" he said as they buckled in.

"Hmm?" Aria asked, miles away.

"The airport?" Ezra smiled nervously.

Aria laughed, "Oh . . . uh, LaGuardia." Ezra nodded as they pulled into the mass of cars heading north. This was going to be a bumpy ride.

**Thanks for reading guys! Please update, you're the bestest.**


	6. Uh oh

**Sorry this took an ETERNITY! Been a wee bit pre-occupied. Love you all super crazy amount for not walking out on this story!**

Aria bit her nails nervously as she scanned the streets, begging the car would break down soon.

"Aria, what is going on?" Ezra glanced over at his ex. "You seem like you're bugging over something."

"I'm fine." She mumbled.

"Not looking forward to seeing your cousin?" He smiled, referencing to a time when Aria's actual cousin, Kellyaha, came to Rosewood for a week and destroyed every other item in Aria's room due to her clumsiness.

Aria shifted in the car's seat, "You could say that . . ." Aria wasn't being fair to him, stringing him along like this. But she was being selfish because she knew once he knew what was really going on, he wouldn't even try to come between herself and Austin. He was too good to be the _other man_.

It was unbelievable how quickly it had seemed they got to LaGuardia International. As soon as the car was parked, she jumped out. And needless to say was than thrilled when she heard Ezra trailing behind her. "You don't have to come with me, I'm a big girl!"Aria smiled, trying not to seem ungrateful.

"Aria, it's no problem at all." He smiled. Damn that smile that still made her go weak kneed. She gulped incoherently. As she debated whether to tell him now or later, they entered the C Gate where Austin's plane was coming in. Her mind was racing.

Suddenly a ring jolted Aria to reality.

"Shit . . ." Ezra glared at the screen. "It's my publisher."

"You're publisher? You neglected to tell me you were a published writer, Mr. Ezra J. Fitz." Aria smiled widely. Even when she was worried to hell and back, she couldn't help feel overly happy for him.

He smiled, "Yeah but he wants to meet up. Like yesterday so I have to go . . ."

"Like I said, I'm a big girl." She smiled.

He smirked and leaned down to kiss her. And again, she didn't fight it. She gave in to the electric channel just like before. "I'll see you soon." He smiled, blissfully unaware of everything going on around him, and jogged out of the terminal.

Aria roamed around aimlessly for about an hour before Austin landed.

"Buttercup!" he announced, his arms wide open for a hug. Aria laughed and ran to him, letting Austin envelope her in a bear hug.

"Don't ever leave me again . . ." she laughed playfully into his ear, even though with those words her stomach lurched.

"Nothing doing, sweet pea." His arm wrapped around her and for some reason it felt heavier than usual.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

It wasn't like they never made love before. Austin and Aria were a very outwardly affectionate couple. They were getting married! But she was always focused on him when they did it.

Now as they were moving and moaning and gasping together, images of Ezra were dancing around her mind. She closed her eyes, wanting it to stop.

Suddenly she snapped her eyes open and was hurt and ashamed by the not ivory green eyes she's come accustomed to, but the deep blue oceans she saw instead.

**I know that was short, too, but I was busy writing the final chapter. Please review, love you all!**


	7. We    die?

**I can't explain why there was a year long gap but I can apologize and hope you accept it**

Aria walked into her favorite bookstore and trotted right up to the clerk's desk. "High, do you have anything by Fitz, Ezra?" she smiled. The teenager rolled her eyes and typed in the name to the stores database.

"No . . ." she mumbled.

Aria turned slightly then remembered a conversation herself and Ezra had several years ago.

**Flashback**

"How can someone have so many books?" her eyes grazed the wall to wall book collection. Ezra smiled giving her a mug of thick hot chocolate.

"Years of collecting. I promise you, I haven't even read half these books." He sipped lightly at the cocoa.

Aria turned and smiled at him, inching closer, "Maybe I can help you get through them." She played lightly with his tie and smiled.

"Mrs. Montgomery . . . are you trying to seduce me?"

Aria chuckled, "Is it working?"

"Oh, yeah." Ezra picked her up, her cocoa running over in the process onto his back. "Ahh. Shit . . . Shit, shit that burns."

"Oh, no!" Aria put her cocoa on a side table and helped him to the kitchen. "C'mon. let me get the shirt off." She pulled the sticky, warm cotton off his body. It was red but there wasn't too much damage. She got a dish towel and ran it under warm water.

"The Ezra Fitz way to do sexy\fun never does work out." Ezra smiled. Aria smirked and began blotting the area.

"I wouldn't prefer any other way of sexy\funny if it's all the same with you." Ezra took her free hand and kissed it gently, placing it to his cheek. "It's true!" Aria smiled.

"Do you think you'd like my sexy\funny if my name was Jay Fitzgerald?" he asked.

Aria smiled broadly, "What?"

"Well . . . I was just thinking you know if the writing thing ever works out I think I'd get a pen name. And I thought about Jay Fitzgerald."

Aria smiled and stopped blotting, putting her arms around him, "Well, for now, will you just be my Ezra Fitz?" Ezra smiled back and kissed her softly.

**Flashback**

"U-um what about Fitzgerald, Jay?" Aria prodded. The teen typed it in.

"Uh . . . yeah. We have two. Which ones do you want."

Aria smiled lightly, "Both, please."

The teen nodded and yelled, "Jerry! Two more of those Fitzgerald books." A small man shuffled up several minutes later with the books and Aria walked out with them smiling. She walked to the Starbucks around the corner to sit down with the books.

"Double shot macchiato, please." She smiled at the barista. It was a slow day at the shop so Aria got the coffee sooner than usual. When she got to the corner booth her phone rang. Two calls were coming in. Austin and Hanna. Aria bit her lip and picked Hanna. She couldn't talk to Austin with last night on her mind.

"Hey babe." Hanna smiled. "What you doing?"

Aria eased onto the cushiony booth, "Don't kill me."

"Oh, no." Hanna sighed.

"It's not bad . . . I'm just reading his books." Aria sipped the coffee which burned the tip of her tongue.

"Wait, Fitzy got published?" Hanna said, and Aria could hear the smile in her voice.

"Yeah. And I think their doing really well. The way the salesgirl was talking about it . . . I don't know."

"Well, tell him kudos next time you see him."

"Hanna . . ."

"I'm sorry. Okay, I'm sorry. The reason I called was to ask you out to dinner because guess who's in town?"

"Who?" Aria smiled. "Don't tell me . . ."

"Yep, Spence and Em are both going to be here tonight. So grab your best drinking outfit and meet us up at my place."

Aria smiled, "Of course. I want to read some of these, though, so I love you."

"Love you, too, babe." Hanna hung up and Aria dropped the phone into her bag. She pulled out the two books, immediately turning them over to read the summaries. The first name caught her eye immediately. B-26

_A seamless book of beautiful poetry by a new author, this collection will make you laugh, cry, and beg for more. In his writing debut, Jay Fitzgerald puts his heart on his sleeve and lets you enter into his mind for a journey you won't soon forget._

"Oh, Ezra, you did not write that summary . . ." Aria smiled. She smiled and turned to the next book. What Would I Do Without You?

_A stolen kiss, an innocent smile, and 1 hour. That's all it took for Eric Montgomery to fall for Arielle Fitzroy. But when it turns out that Arielle is Eric's student, are they willing to let their romance die? Or will they fight for it with everything they have? Jay Fitzgerald writes this in such a deeply personal recount, you find yourself hoping this tragic love story is real. A timeless recount of forbidden love and how we strive to make it work. _

"Miss?" a small voice asked. Aria looked up, realizing she was crying.

"Yes?" she looked up to see the petite woman who had made her coffee.

"Miss are you alright? You've been crying . . ."

"Yes, I-I'm fine. I'm sorry I'm just a little emotional."

The woman smiled and walked away. Aria whisked away her tears and breathed in softly. She was going to read these in the privacy of her own home. The home she shared with Austin. Her fiancé. She left the store quickly, her head down. She just turned the corner when she smashed into someone.

"Aria?" _No. Not now._ She looked up to see Ezra, who was helping her pick up the books. "Oh, don't tell me." Ezra smiled. Aria smiled, embarrassed. "I remembered that time when um . . ."

"The hot chocolate . . ." Ezra laughed. "I can't believe you remembered that." Aria just giggled.

"Don't worry, I've only read the summaries." He helped her up. "I was reading the summery for the novel. I don't think I need to ask what your inspiration was." Ezra ducked his head.

"Before you read that . . . you have to understand I wrote half of it when we were together and half of it after I left." Ezra moved his hands about like he always did when he was nervous.

"What happens?" Aria poked the book at him.

Ezra shut his eyes and looked as though he was about to get punched, "We die . . ."

"Ezra!" Aria punched him square in the shoulder.

"Ahah . . . That hurt!" **(Anyone else piss themselves laughing when they first saw that scene!) **Ezra rubbed it.

"We die? Come on, Ezra!"Aria pushed him lightly. Ezra noticed her slightly shaking.

"You're laughing." He said with a smile. Aria nodded and kept laughing, leaning her forehead to his shoulder and breathlessly laughing. "It's not funny!" Ezra laughed himself. Aria just smiled and backed away, wiping tears of laughter from her eyes.

"I have to get going." She smiled.

"Right now?" Ezra asked. She couldn't help but feel a slight thrill at his disappointment. He wanted to be with her.

"Yeah, the girls are back in town. We've got a big night ahead of us." Aria smiled.

"Well I hope you have fun. I'll call you?" Ezra asked.

_No . . . NO! . . . Aria . . . Don't you dare do-"_Yes." She smiled. Ezra nodded and walked by.

"Oh . . . and Aria . . ." she turned slightly to face him, "For the poetry book, I think you should just skip ahead to page 56."

Aria smiled, "I'll do that. Bye."

Ezra smiled, "Bye."

**I know the ending went on a bit but I got writers block around where she starts laughing because I had to run out and buy some stuff for my mum half way through that bit. Please review!**


	8. Local Godess

**I just finished this big move from across the country so please understand why this took so long. I've been without wireless connection for so long and that isn't fair to anyone so please no mean reviews, just positive ones, and enjoy the update. P.S. I will tell you guys when the last chapter is so stop freaking out! LOL, please read. **

Aria pushed open the heavy loft door, smelling fresh coffee immediately. "Hey baby." Austin's oaky, southern voice called out. She smiled placing the books on the side table near their phone in the den.

"Hi. That smells great, can I get a cup?" She sighed, kissing him on the cheek before grabbing her favorite coffee creamer out of the fridge. He smiled and poured her a cup, leaving room for the cream.

"I figured it's been a while since we've had some time to ourselves. I planned a little date night for us tonight." Austin smiled, leaning against the counter, pleased with himself.

Aria furrowed her eyebrows, "Tonight? Oh, no . . ."

"What?" Austin asked, a slight pissed tone in his voice. "Let me guess, Hanna?" Over the course of their relationship, Austin's distain of Hanna and Aria's extremely close friendship hadn't gone un noticed.

Aria shut the refrigerator door. "Actually all my friends who I haven't seen in months! And why are you being such a dick?"

"Well, I'm sorry but it seems like every time we try to do anything it falls through the cracks or I'm not good enough for you and it just gets to a point where I have to put down my foot and say I'm your fiancée." Austin's green eyes burned with pain. Aria knew it was true. She had been neglecting him for an awful long time.

She shut her eyes, feeling red patches creep up her neck. "I'm sorry." She whispered. Austin wiped his hand over his face then into his ashy blonde hair. "No, I am. I'm sorry I just spoke to you like you were a child or something. I just . . . I've been stressing over work and the wedding . . . I'm just sorry."

Aria moved her coffee cup away from the edge of the counter and walked over to Austin, taking his big hands in her small ones. "Go hang out with your friends, okay? Most of the stuff I planned was stuff that can be very easily rescheduled."

"Are you sure? I mean, now I feel kinda like a jack ass." Aria murmured.

Austin smiled, "You aren't a jack ass. You're my beautiful, intelligent, talented, over-all amazing fiancé." Aria let out a sigh. She hated when he complimented her like that. It made her feel dirty and a little like the perfect little Martha Stewart slash Barbara Bush house wife to be Austin seemed to want to mold her into. It just, for some reason, didn't feel awesome like when Ezra used to do it. Austin kissed her forehead and Aria nodded, heading to their bedroom. Austin swatted her butt lightly before she was out of reach.

Aria shut the door behind her and decided tonight she wasn't going to be Engaged Aria Montgomery. She was going to be You Don't Know If I'm Single Or Not, So Don't Ask Just Kiss Me Aria Montgomery. Fearlessly, she walked over to her closet with a smirk on her face. She peeled off her not-a-sports-bra sports bra and popped on a lacy, black strapless push up bra. Finally, she pulled out a strapless, skin-tight purple tube dress that barely skimmed her thighs (It had been a lengthy decision between that and her backless red halter dress). She tied up peep-toe, black ankle boots that had shiny silver aglets. She bit her lip lightly, admiring herself in her floor length mirror.

There was a light rap at the door. Aria nearly broke her ankle throwing on a red kimono dress she'd had since a trip to Japan when she was seventeen. What Austin didn't know, I.E. the fact that she was wearing a boyfriend's nightmare\fantasy under said kimono, wouldn't hurt him. "Hey." She smiled, opening the door.

"I just got a call from the office, I gotta go and it sounds like it'll be a while. I'll probably still be out when you leave so I just wanted to say bye before I head off."

"Okay." Aria smiled in a hurried voice. Austin smiled pecking her on the lips before heading out the door. Aria shut the door again, dropping the kimono to her ankles. She sat in front of her large vanity mirror and began to do her make-up as her hot curlers heated up. When she was ecstatic with her appearance, she put in a loose JumboRodd in several areas of her hair. Just enough to get that loose wave look she adored.

Finally she decided she was ready, threw in the necessities of her silver clutch and grabbed her vintage couture black shrug before leaving the loft. She tried to hide her smirk at the numerous sounds from people on the street.

"Damn, sexy!"

"Hey, Bay-bay!"

"Come see me later, sugar!"

All she had to do was throw her hand up and three taxi's pulled to a stop near the curb. When she was finally at Hanna's she hit the small button and heard Hanna's voice through the box.

"Hello?"

"It's Brittany, bitch." Aria laughed, hearing an immediate buzz, letting her know she was cleared into the building. She was greeted by tight hugs from Emily and Spencer before each of the three other girls took her in. "What?" she looked down, slightly self-conscious.

Emily shrugged, "Nothing. It's just last time we talked you said you were getting married."  
>"Yeah . . . things not so sunny in paradise?" Spencer asked, a little too much smile in her voice. She's never been Austin's biggest fan.<p>

Aria rolled her eyes, "Dressing up isn't a crime. I'm just having some fun with my girls. Now come on! I'm getting married in like two weeks and I need a big ass drink." The four girls started to chuckle and left, soon in front of a club called TURBuLANCE. Apparently the lower cased u was meant to be trendy or hipster-ish. Aria ordered a scotch and sat on one of the surprisingly comfortable stools while she watched her friends. The no longer shy Emily was sandwiched between a pretty red-headed girl and a black haired hot guy who looked like he was in his mid thirties, but in a hot way. Spencer was playfully stirring a stranger's drink and Hanna was dancing very closely with a nice looking Italian guy who's palms where plastered to Hanna's ass. She was both disappointed and surprised by how little fun she was having. She was also shocked by the fact she couldn't get Ezra out of her mind. She threw down several dollars for the scotch and snaked through the crowd to get to the girls room.

It smelled like Acqia Di Gio for Women and moth balls. Aria sat on the turquoise loveseat that was pushed against the sinks and flipped through her clutch, finding that her phone was lit up. She rose an eyebrow then tapped the screen, seeing she had a new text from . . . Ezra.

_Can't stop thinking of you. Don't hate me or think I'm a stalker but I'd really like to see you. I'm at my place now plz text me back. Love Ez_

She glanced at the phone's clock. The text was from twenty minutes ago. She frowned down at her ring, making an aggravated noise at it. Aria dropped the phone into the clutch and walked out to the dance floor again, an old Adam Lambert song throbbing. She snaked up to Hanna, who had peeled away from Ass Hands and moved to the bar herself. "I'm not feeling well. I'm heading out."

"What? We just got here. And you look so pretty!" Hanna was already tipsy.

Aria nodded, "We'll hang out tomorrow, promise. Love you, Han." She pinched Hanna's cheek lightly and left, sliding past the meaty bouncer on her way out. Just as she left the corner she saw one of those big red NYC Tours busses. It had an advertisement for the new Juicy Couture perfume painted on the side.

Take Chance. Live Without Regrets. Flaunt Juicy

"Right . . ." Aria smirked. But as soon as she said it, the text appeared in her head again. Aria swallowed hard, opening her clutch again and switching the ring for her phone. Tapping in the familiar number, she brought it up to her lips, "Ezra? That offer still up for grabs?"

**I know that was like the worst chapter . . . ever . . . but I just got wi-fi back and I had to give you something even if it sucked. Please review**


	9. Too Soon, Too Late

**Please just read**

**Oh, and p.s. I wrote this at three a.m. so if it seems like I was drunk, I was just tired. **

"Hi." I smiled at Ezra as he opened the door.

His eyes boggled a little at my dress and I pulled at eh hem, self conscious. "Hey." He breathed, that silly smirk coming to his face. "Uh, I mean, um, come in." I giggled lightly, side stepping around him.

I breathed in the apartment. So much like Rosewood, but none of the same essence. "Like the place." I smiled. He smirked, shutting the door. I pointed up to his Foreign Film Press poster, "You still have it."

"'Course I do." Ezra came up, standing next to me. "I've had a hard time getting rid of anything associated with you. But this I wouldn't give this bad boy up anyway." His words burrowed down inside me like a tic, hurting just as much as those parasitic little bastards did. I remembered the day I had gifted this to him, a small and extremely random gift that had turned a kiss into . . . well . . . the first time . . .

"So, um, I still haven't read the poem, _Jay_." I smiled, hoping my voice didn't sound too thick as I changed the subject.

Ezra was taken aback but then smile sheepishly, realizing now was not a time I wanted to use to dwell on the past. "I have the book here, if you want to." He left to retrieve it. I don't why it tickled me so much but I erupted into laughter.

"Oh no! Your one of those authors!" I smiled. He chuckled and rolled his eyes as he burrowed through his book box. He found the book and handed it to me but I put my hand up.  
>"Would . . . You read it to me?" I asked. He looked down at it then me and nodded. We sat down on his leather loveseat and waited. He gave me one last glance, like it was the last time he'd see me, before starting.<p>

"_When did I love you? Instantly. When did I know? Too late. The eyes so full of unrelenting turmoil that gave me the most pleasure, flickered away soon due to my neglect, lilting away as I did the same. Soon marred are those so early made in the obstacle of love and barrier of fate. Which as unbreakable as the perpetual virginity of your soul kept me away long enough for me to never mind the escape and release I so yearned for in you. To say I love you is an insult. Love is a useless word. The word much greater than love and all other variations could all equal, yet not shine as bright, as Aria."_

I didn't realize the tears were there till I stood up and the motion made them fall. "How dare you?"

"W-what?" Ezra stuttered.

I threw the book from his hand against the wall and shrieked. "How DARE you! How could you have written those things and felt those things and let me think you didn't love me!"

"We already discussed this." Ezra stood up. "Jackie said she wou-"

Tears shook down my cheeks in sheets. "No. That's not what I mean. I mean why didn't you tell me THAT when I was seventeen. Ezra we could have made it work. We could have fought! This whole time I never knew you loved me as much as I loved you. But now, knowing you've hidden it from me? It's so much worse!"

"Aria please . . ." he came forward, his jaw tight as his own tears trickled from his eyes.

"Don't touch me . . ." I whimpered.

He ran his fingers through his hair. "Damn it Aria! I can't lose you again." My breath caught as he grabbed my shoulders. "I won't lose you."

"Ezra get off. Let me go!" I began pummeling his arms and chest, tears spilling over and over down my cheeks. He pulled me tighter to his chest and eventually my punches slowed and just my mangled sobbing was left. Before I knew it I was actually hanging to him for support. I don't know if I was just lonely, scared, angry or what, but I was surprised by my own words.

"Make love to me Ezra."

His fingers, which had become knotted in my hair, slowed their rhythmic movements. "What?"

I looked up at him. "For once . . . I don't care how pathetic it sounds. How childish . . . how sad. I need you. I've missed you so much. And I just . . . I just need you now."

I nestled my head under his chin again, my ragged breathing becoming slightly normal again. Wordlessly, he slowly carried me to the bed, our lips never moving from each other's. For the first time in years, I felt whole again."

**Was it worth the wait? No. Will you forgive me and REVIEW your little bummies off? Oh Gawd, I hope so.**


	10. Speak now

**Okay everyone! No tears, we all knew this day would come. The day when Ezra has to say goodbye. All we can do is hope this is just a cruel, fake plot twist that will be over next week. That being said, we also knew the end of this story would come. I've loved this story so much! It's going to be an extra long chapter for you today so enjoy and thank you for all you've done for me while I wrote this story!**

**NOT FIRST PERSON!**

Over the next three weeks, Aria spent all her time at Ezra's apartment. It was easy with Austin gone all the time on business, racking up honeymoon days. She tried to push him back far, far away from her mind. But now it was Monday and tomorrow she was leaving. She had delayed it mentally for the longest time, but now it was reality. She glanced at the clock for the tenth time as she heard Ezra coming up behind her with two glasses of red wine. "Are you alright?" he asked.

She looked up, blinking furiously. "Uh-h yeah. I just can't spend the night. Plans with Hanna." That was a joke. Hanna had been cooled off ever since Aria revealed what was going on with herself and Ezra.

"Okay." He smiled, "Do you want me to take you home?"

"No!" Aria said to quickly. "I mean, I just want to be with you a little longer, okay?" she took the wine and sipped it lightly.

"Aria I'm not dying, we have plenty of time." Tears welled in her eyes, but Aria held them out of view. "You know", he continued, "I almost feel like this is our second chance. I love you so much and I know it is going to take you some time to get over what . . . happened . . . between us but I just want you to know, you're my forever." She wanted to purge.

"I love you, too. So, so much but . . ." her façade faltered momentarily before she was able to recompose herself, "But I do need to go." She knocked back the wine and grabbed her purse. She tightly wrapped her arm around Ezra's neck. "Bye, Ez." she said through a strangled voice, knowing full well he could possibly never want to her after the wedding.

He squeezed her back but the confusion on his face stayed, "Bye." He sighed, his voice a low whisper as she shut the door.

Aria breathed heavily as she clasped her earrings into her ears with care. The diamonds shone brightly in the Hawaiian sun that was peaking through her bridal suite room curtains. Tomorrow she was finally going to do it. She was going to marry Austin. Because she loved him.

She loved him and he was completely and totally right for her. She continued to chant that thought to herself. No matter how bad she felt about not telling Ezra, about leaving him without a warning, where she was or anything other than 'I'm getting married!", she had to do this. Because it was what was right. Just then there was a knock on her door.

"Come in . . ." she croaked out. Hanna walked in, her blonde hair in a curly halo around her face. "You look beautiful." Aria smiled. She'd been able to convince Hanna that Ezra was over, and normalcy had resumed.

Hanna smiled, "Yeah well I'm not getting married tomorrow. You are. How are you feeling?"

Aria smiled sadly, "I'm holding up okay. My mind is going a mile a minute and my heart . . ."

"You're heart?" Hanna asked.

"My heart . . ." Aria continued, "Isn't sure if this is right."

"Aria . . . Ezra may be your great love. But Austin is the right kind of love. He is stability and reassurance and you love him."

Aria gulped, "But it's a different kind of love, Han. My heart doesn't stop when Austin walks into a room. My pulse doesn't skip beats when we kiss. And even though I do love him more than I thought I ever could, when Ezra broke my heart I never got all of it back. And ever since we saw one another again, I've been getting it back and then some." Aria let the tears trickle down her cheeks without pausing them.

Hanna breathed in shakily, deeply hurting for her friend, and looked down, "I thought this situation was over." Aria just shook her head and began to swipe the tears away. "This is the one time I can't help you, love."

Aria nodded, "I know. But I have to figure something out fast."

Austin stood outside of Aria's Bridal Suite, taking in every word. As he heard each new syllable, his heart broke more. Not because Aria was in love with another person, even though that didn't help, but because he was in the way of her happiness. Austin loved her with every piece of his heart, and all he wanted was for her to be happy. And if he couldn't do that, he knew exactly who could . . .

Ezra ran into LaGuardia International with a ticket clasped in a deadly grip under his right thumb. He had memorized the gate number and plane information over and over again to the point of obsession in the last fourteen minutes. He was surprised he hadn't gotten a ticket due to his unruly speeding.

An hour ago he'd gotten an anonymous message on his voicemail from an unfamiliar, southern voice.

_Aria and Austin are getting married at the Restegoda Hotel in Maui, Hawaii tomorrow. I'll stall the wedding as long as possible, but this is your chance, Ezra. Make it count. _

Whoever it was Ezra would have to thank countless amounts.

He rushed up to an attendant with short red hair and a large nose. "You'll have to go to baggage drop off first sir."

"I don't have any baggage!" he scratched his forehead frustrated. "At least not physical baggage . . ." he mumbled under his breath. "Ma'am I need t be on this plane now!"

"Sir, you're tone is frightening other passengers." Ezra took note of the worried glances.

"I'm sorry, but if I don't get on this plane the love of my life is going to marry some beat-nick, redneck, Texan . . ."

"Sir, derogatory comments can be filed as . . ." he cut the woman off.

"Dammit, can you just click my fucking ticket?" Ezra yelled at her. He usually wasn't so rash with women but he had no time for politeness. She reached for the ticket, punched it, and handed it back.

"Have a nice flight, dick . . ." she sighed before putting an _Assistance Needed _sign on her podium and walking away. Ezra ran down the gate into the plane and sat down, begging for the plane to start moving.

"You look beautiful, Sis." Mike smiled, shutting the door behind himself.

Aria looked over her shoulder, "You look pretty dapper, yourself." Her voice was thick, but she masked it well. She took note of his blood shot eyes. "You okay?"

He nodded, "It got a little weird last night at Austin's bachelor party."

"He didn't have a bachelor party." She said, remembering his slightly cagy demeanor at the rehearsal dinner last night.

"We had one in his honor!"

Aria gave him a dubious look.

"I had one in his honor."

She folded her arms.

He looked down, "I went to a strip club."

Aria rolled her eyes but couldn't help laughing at this. Mike chuckled, too, then let his hand flutter down, "It's time. You ready?"

As the wheels hit the ground and the attendants began to dismiss passengers, Ezra ran quickly down the steps, shifting quickly past the Hula Skirt clad women with leys and _Get _Leyed_ in Hawaii _Tee shirts. It was exactly three hours till the wedding and Ezra was planning on wasting no time.

Restagoda Hotel, and please hurry!"

He threw four twenties at the cab driver who smirked, "Where fire? No volcano in three year, tourist." But the heavy set man began driving anyway and Ezra almost kissed the white sand surrounding the resort.

He had two hours to spare, but no time to lose.

As Mike's girlfriend Chloe belted out the last note of the harmonious arrangement, Aria felt her heels sink into the sand, glad that Hanna had talked her out of wearing shoes.

"Only another few minutes and I'll be walking down the isle . . ." Aria smiled, her eyes on her little brother. She smiled at Chloe as she found her seat, "When are you planning to pop the question?"

"At the reception." Mike answered without skipping a beat.

Aria was taken back, "Well will you look at that? My brother is growing up."

"Too bad mom and dad couldn't be here." Mike sighed, nudging Aria's elbow.

Ella and Byron had been in the middle of a wretched divorce over the last two weeks and today had been a mandatory court date.

"At least I have you . . . and Hanna." Aria nodded towards the blonde who was getting rather frisky with a groomsmen. Mike laughed and poked his tongue in his cheek briefly as the Wedding March began.

"You ready to end your life as a Montgomery?"

Aria just smiled and took her brothers arm.

Ezra roamed hastily around the beach, desperately looking for those same chocolate curls twisting around in the breeze. "Where are you?" he whispered.

Then, ever so lightly from a distance, he heard, "Dearly beloved . . ." and his feet never returned to the ground.

Aria's heart was beating out of her chest as the priest read on. She did notice Austin's eyes darting back and forth from the beach to Aria.

"Are you alright?" she whispered.

A honey slow smile spread across his face as he looked over her shoulder, "I will be soon enough."

Aria smiled weakly and took in another unsteady breath.

"If there is anyone here who objects to this union, please speak now or forever . . ."

"I sure as hell object . . ." Aria heard that heart breaking familiar voice call out. She quickly turned around as guests gasped.

"Ezra?" she called. A beautiful smile spread across his lips as he ran up to her. She quickly looked at Austin with a confused look on her face.

Austin just grinned, "If you love me, you'll leave Hawaii with him."

Ezra had paused at the beginning of the sandy isle.

"How did you . . .?" she asked Austin.

But he just took her hand and squeezed it. With wet eyes, Aria looked deeply into Austin's heart. She crushed herself to him and softly whispered, "Thank you . . ." into his ears, then ran down the aisle to Ezra's awaiting arms. They quickly raced off, kicking sand behind them in the haste, even though they had no idea where they were going. All they knew was that they were going there together. And that suited them just fine.

Mike walked up to Austin, "What the hell just happened?"

Austin smiled, "We have a men's wedding ring and a paid for wedding that could go to waste. Got any ideas?" he smiled at Mike, who laughed and turned to the guests. One in particular.

"Chloe?"

**The End **

**Please review, my lovelies! **


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